Returning to Work

Next week I go back to work. Sigh...  Fortunately, due to my line of work and my loving husband who listened to my pleas to be a stay at home mom, my hours are minimal. I will be working three days a week, twelve clients total, and then of course the paperwork (which is never ending). I still have about 250 hours to complete for my license, so it was important to Chris and me that I complete these hours during the time I am allowed.

So, I will be easing back into my client load next week. We are blessed to have a sweet friend watch Henry on Tuesdays, Chris will be able to watch him Wednesdays and my mom and dad volunteered to watch the little guy Thursdays.  I don't start work until four, Chris gets off work on Tuesday and Thursday at 5ish and only works until 12:30 on Wednesday, so it works out.

I still am not ready though. I love being with my little guy. As the days go by, he changes more and more.

More smiles, more coos, more silly faces, more alert time.

I get worried that I will miss something and have to remind myself the likelihood that I will is there, but the likelihood that Chris would catch it if I missed something is likely as well which makes me feel better.

I have already started to read up or have been informed of some of my caseload. Whoa. I want to stay home so bad, but know there are some hurting people out there and know deep, deep down, this is what I am supposed to be doing.

So, prayers appreciated as I start back. I'm praying that I finally learn the art of separating personal life and work life.  That I can find a balance to complete my paperwork when I would rather be doing house work (gasp) or sleeping during Henry's naps.  That this "new mom haze", as I like to call it, will lift soon so that I can give Henry my full attention when I am with him and the same goes for my clients.  That Henry will continue to improve on his nights so we can both be well rested (the kid is doing great).

For today, the laundry will go untouched, I doubt I will put makeup on, and my hair will air dry (which is common, boy do I wish I had curly hair so this wasn't an issue). Henry and I will be playing, chit chatting, and cuddling.

You knew I would include a picture of this sweet face.

One Month!

Dear Henry,

Happy one month baby boy!  You have changed like a mad man over this first month, can't fathom how much you will continue to change. Hard to believe an adult size man is in that little body. Your face has gone from a completely round circle to some definition to a circle again :) We can't get enough of it!

We visited the doctor at three weeks where you weighed in at 9lbs 2oz. We don't go back until your two month visit and know that number will be plumped up quite a bit by then. You are a great eater and our times of having to use wash clothes to keep you awake to eat aren't nearly as often.  You eat every three hours during the day with bedtime being at 8:00.  I get you out of bed at 11 for one last feeding and then let you go for as long as you will allow.  You have started to go four hour stretches (knock on wood), we hope this continues and keeps stretching!

You love your play mat and have started to regularly reach and bat at your little friends. You also like to look at yourself in the mirror, you even know you are cute!  Dad is your favorite, in my opinion. You light up when he comes home and could walk around with him bright eyes for what seems like forever. You recognize your momma though, which melts my heart.  You have started to coo more and will mimic the ohhhh face and sound at times.

We read stories often, take tours of the house, fold laundry together, take walks in our stroller, and just hang out during our days.  You enjoy going to your dad's softball games, we've been to church twice, and have frequented both sets of grandparents' houses.  I still have to prep myself to take you out, but I'm getting better... 

We are going through a fussy time right now.  We can't decide if it is a little cold, gas, or reflux.  Time will tell I suppose, you keep us on our toes for sure.

You are a delightful little boy and can't believe a month as already passed!

Look at that face!!!

Who knows what he was upset about here.

Starting to get a little snug in his newborn outfits.

Yup, that is spit up.  That is how our "photo shoot" started.  Awesome.

Impossible to get the active guy to look up.

All boy, that's for sure.

Oh Henry, you are too cute for your own good.

Oh Henry

We are still alive, I promise. While there has been plenty going on in the Boschen household, not a lot of time to blog. Last night however, is noteworthy. So, as my cantankerous son sleeps on the couch cushion beside me (due to me feeling terrible for my sleep deprived husband), I shall blog.

Henry is a dreamy babe. His personality is starting to come out and we giggle at him often. He farts and burps like a man, is a crazy mover, and ornery to high heaven.  We wouldn't have it any other way.

Chris and I decided to follow the babywise method with Henry due to seeing its success with our niece, nephew, and my sister's friend's three children. Granted we know the first month is dicey, you have to feed the child and your "schedule" might look different daily, over all it has been great with the exception of night time :)

Henry's nights are for the most part normal for this stage. He still wakes up every three hours as a general rule and we have decided that is fine until he is a month. Last night was one of his shining moments though. One of those nights you really have to laugh about because really?  What else can you do?!

We have our bed time routine at eight, consisting of Good Night Moon, prayers, jammies, and a few cuddles.  After that we put him down.  I wake him at eleven for one last feeding for the night and then let him go.  Last night was one for the books!

He began to whimper at 12:30.  I rolled over to Chris, frustrated and exasperated, not real sure what to do.  We let him cry for 30 minutes (it wasn't a full on cry the whole time, he would calm down and then start back up again) and then Chris thought it might be best to go ahead and feed him.  Perhaps it would give us a long stretch and maybe he just wasn't quite full after eating at 11.  I rolled out of bed and fed Henry who ate really, really well. 

I lifted the sweet, sleepy boy up to burp him and...  throw up, all over me.  I remained calm, luckily the mess was on me, not him.  He was pretty calm about the whole matter so I made sure I wasn't dripping and proceeded to change him.  He is a gassy guy, as I mentioned, so he was tooting a little while I was changing him.  He didn't seem quite complete with his "movement", so I kept the diaper under him.  Because really, who wants to put a fresh diaper on a child who you know if going to defile it in no time.  He gave a little grunt and poof, poop flew all over me, the couch, the floor, and the iPad.  This I could not handle on my own so I sheepishly hollered for Chris to come out and help.  Fortunately, he heard me (there have been events in the past where he was out cold).  After a good 15 minute clean up process, Henry was down in his bed and I was cleaning myself off as best as I could in the bathroom. 

The rest of the night was of course, not the greatest.  But, Chris and I laughed hysterically at two in the morning about an event in parenthood that will always be remembered.

I write this post to be a tad transparent and to possibly provide a little laugh at our expense.  This parenthood business is no joke!  I originally had this mind set to "fake it until you make it" and not let anyone know the struggles we have.  While I do not intend to sit and complain about things and probably will not have many posts like this, I felt like I had to share.  I am in a group that meets on Monday mornings consisting of all moms which I love.  Yesterday my sweet friend Rachel shared that in today's society, we are allowed little windows into each others' lives.  Instagram, facebook, blogging, etc.  It is easy to share the good moments and leave out the not so grand.  Here is me giving a glimpse into the not so grand.  I have poop between my toes that didn't get cleaned last night, throw up caked in my hair, and three monster zits on my chin where I perhaps get a zit once every six months. 

But, I wouldn't trade it for a million bucks or more.  This season of life is priceless.  All of the rough edges you aren't aware that you have (or refuse to work on) are put out there and you become completely humbled.  I am a structured, control freak but I can't be with him.  Yeah, yeah, we have a schedule, but that isn't because of my controlling ways, the reasons for us having a schedule is another post in itself.  I am prideful and tend to compare myself to others, but I cannot with Henry because Henry is Henry and our family is our family.  I am impatient, but can't be as a mom because things happen when and as they should.  I get overwhelmed, but have to remain calm now and buck up because I've got this little guy relying on me.

So, this is my "being a mom is hard" post.  But, by golly it is SO WORTH IT!!!!!  We have a healthy, sweet little boy.  He melts our hearts and is so fun.  He changes each day and so I am forced to enjoy every little moment and just slow down. 

Henry, you are quite the character and we love you so much.  Can't wait to see how you will continue to change our lives.